VICE Party

So, I didn't get to go to the VICE party because I'm stuck in the land of kimchi and plastic surgery, but luckily my friend Finn (who you may remember from this post) stepped in to save the day.


And get a free ticket to see Tom Vek.

Anyway, here's his awesome review, which made me uber jealous.


Can I come home now please?

After years of attempting to secure the vice.com domain from a stubborn porn site, VICE finally beat down the final sex gimp standing in their way.  Some say it was a 3ft tall transsexual midget built like a brick shit house, armed with none other than a 12” black rubber cock and covered from head to toe in KY jelly.  This he/she was not going down without a fight, but, nonetheless VICE prevailed victorious and viceland.com and vbs.tv are now successfully married.  Cue party.

 Upon finally finishing work in the not so sunny welsh capital Cardiff, myself and my ride seated ourselves on the blood red leather seats of his mother in law’s Mazda MX-5 and speedily took to the M4 as hairdressers in disguise.  We needed a ride, judgement will not be tolerated! Running an hour later than planned because of speed caps, traffic jams and crashes we arrived at VICE mag’s busy-ass celebratory party in association with the new free music download site boinc.com, located at Factory 7 in Shoreditch, London. The excitement was as unbearable as the beer thirst that had built up on the journey.  Cool, calm and collected we got our wristbands, blended in with the hipsters, grabbed a beer and lapped up the atmosphere. Having missed half of the acts at this neatly promoted shindig due to our error in geographical placement on the map, we still got to catch all of live acts Factory Floor and headliner Tom Vek.  Factory Floor’s awesome post-apocalyptic disco synth, a really raw and enjoyable sound, brought a resemblance to early Joy Division and worked really well in the build up to Tom Vek.  

Whilst waiting for the latter of the two live acts to set up I thought I would go and check out the other room in the venue which saw Rory Phillip’s bring a fresh and uplifting vibe on the turntables making for a great atmosphere. Torn between the two I decided to head back and get a decent spot to witness the ever evasive Tom Vek who kicked things off with Aroused, carrying on to play most of the singles from his new album Leisure Seizure. It has to be said, the short but sweet set went down a storm, ending with the perfectly fitting I Aint Saying My Goodbyes from his debut album left the crowd screaming for more of his unique addition to the Rock genre. As Tom Vek said his goodbyes, reluctantly, so did myself and my lift. A thoroughly well organised and enjoyable launch party in the prime sector of London, big thanks to VICE and Tallullah Elle. 


Check out Finn's blog and follow him on twitter @finngnk

Legowelt

Since it's been about a year since I began this blog, I think it's high time that you all had a break from my mutterings.  Cue my first ever guest blog post by Lucy, author of Being of Sound Mind, one of my weekly (if not daily) reads.  She blogs about a variety of random topics but is secretly a connoisseur of electronic music, hence the theme of today's post:

In the often faceless world of electronic music, it's difficult to become endeared to artists because you love their image [David Guetta - if you're listening, please KEEP OUT of your videos, I'm having nightmares that feature your creepy self (mainly about me wiping that inane grin off your face and burning your 'looted' outfit)].

It can also be difficult to feel an affinity with the artiste, sure - their music can 'speak' to you, even move you, but what kind of  personality do these mysterious expert knob twiddlers have to offer?

Well, listening to a 45 minute monologue about 303's, 808's and whatever other Bontempi equipment was used to create atmospheric, spine-tingling music can be anything BUT enthralling, never mind endearing.

Cue Legowelt. Offering his excellent new album to all via free download is enough of a gift. Then you open the 'text' file:

"Hello.  Welcome to "THE TEAC LIFE", This album is free to download and distribute.

Its got a hella lot deep tape saturated forest-techno tracks on it and when I say Techno i dont mean that boooooooooooring contemprary shit they call techno nowadays with overrated tallentless pretentious docuhebag cunt DJs playing a few halfassed dumb mongo beats and being all arty fartsy about it. 

I am talking about: Raw as fuck autistic Star Trek 1987- Misty Forests- X-FILES,- DETROIT unicorn futurism made on cheap ass digital & analog crap synthesizers recorded in a ragtag bedroom studio on a TEAC VHX cassettedeck in DOLBY C with an unintelligible yet soulful vivacity

if you like it you can donate some $ or Euros, Any donation small or large is appreciated u can paypal to: wolfers@xs4all.nl so I can buy more crap synthesizers to make stuff like this and repair my Roland Juno 106 which stopped working during the recording of this album...probably cause this shit is too deep and it just can't handle it."

Take THAT douchebags.  I'm looking at you Basshunter...

Download Legowelt's THE TEAC LIFE here.

.....................................

Follow Lucy's on her blog and on twitter @yel0wbird for witty and thought-provoking commentary on everyday life.

VICE Launch Party

VICE are having a huge party in London on Thursday because they've managed to acquire the web domain vice.com, which was a porn site in its previous life.

Yay!

I've been offered a pass to cover the event for blog purposes but I can't because of the whole hanging out with Kim Jong Il thang.  I'm pretty gutted because the legendary Tom Vek is playing, along with Factory Floor and Iceage.

  Luckily YOU can go instead.  Yes, that's YOU.  Or at least it will be YOU if you win this competition.  

All you have to do is fill in your details and click submit.  Did I mention that there will be complimentary alcoholic beverages?  And that it will be a huge fuck-off media party full of disgustingly good looking hipsters?

Those are my faves. I'm so upset I can't go.

Also to launch the new website, VICE also want readers to give them feedback in the form of a one-liner.  The most funny/ pithy/ downright outrageous submissions will be featured in the next VICE.com advertising campaign.  To submit your entry then go here, choose an image and paste your idea onto it.  Then blog, tweet and facebook about it.  The winning entry will receive a two page spread in the next VICE issue.

This is my favourite one so far.  Just because I get excited when other people share my skin disease.

Images: VICE

Fashion Week Streaming

Topshop will be streaming fashion week again.  I'm going to have to stay up past my bedtime here in Korea to catch a few of the shows - not that anything will keep me from indulging myself in the hazy delight of a Meadham Kirchhoff show.

Speaking of the designer duo, did anyone else spot the spelling error in the above poster??

Image: Topshop

Back to School

Since I'm back to school now for the autumn term, I'm newly obsessed with these Jeffrey Campbell shoes.

They seem fitting.  Although totally inappropriate for a teacher at an all-boys school.  

Images: Urban Outfitters

FASHION CATS

I've peddled this useless bit of information about me around on the internet before now, but here it is again: my mission in life is to one day own a cat who looks like me.

I've been putting it off for years because what I truly want is several cats that look like me, a zany floral mumu to cover my sickeningly obese body, a porch to sit out on with strawberry daiquiri in one hand, a jumbo galaxy bar in the other, and a crown on my head.  I don't think I'm ready to achieve this dream yet.  At least not the chronically obese part.

Unfortunately, I think I've found the cat of my dreams in this book by Takako Iwasa.

This is me!

Except for the eye colour.  I wonder if the author knows where I can get some cat contact lenses from?  And maybe she'll make me a matching mumu if I ask nicely?

I'd better start binge eating, just in case.

Images: Vice

One Big Group, Full of Bad Bitches

This is the most lolzworthy track I've heard in a while.  Thanks to Karley Sciortino of Slutever for posting it.

Let's Play Spot The Lyrics:

1. Gnarly! radical! on the block I'm magical!

2. I'm colder than the fridge and the freezerrrrrrrrr

3. Groupies follow me like twittAAAA

4. I got the swag and it's pumping out my ovarrrrrrrrrrries.

Altogether Now:

GUCCI GUCCI, LOUIS LOUIS, FENDI FENDI, PRADA
 BASIC BITCHES WEAR THAT SHIT
SO I DON'T EVEN GOTTA.